emo bitches

just found a website on the classification of emo kids. very in depth description of emo kids. even say what they listen to! ahahah. LINK


oh no. i own and regularly wear a stud belt. i'm an emo bitch? argh! someone shoot me. hahahah. and i think john tan can be classified as an emo biatch too! he has the hair, belt but short the ear rings and tatoos cos he's a jc boy!

haiz

wah. year 2006 is is a bad year man. been very unlucky lately. play tetris also no luck. then lost money today somemore. then my ear ring broke. i need to consult a feng shui master.

happy cheena new year!

happy new year everyone! damn i'm addicted to the bak kwa.

esplanade

just now i go with suthan to esplanade library. go and find music scores see got anything nice to learn. knnbccb. got so many books there the only song i want to learn don't have. nabei. wasted. anyway while we were using the computer to search for books suthan fingers itchy. that bastard go anywhere must mess up the place.


heh. cause i'm a voodoo chileeee~~~ woo! out!

people in dramas just dont learn.

when you are chasing someone who enterred an elevator, you go for the buttons, not the fucking door, biatch!

wEi sHeR mO nEHs?

woo. yesteray me and shawn tan were discussing about why ah bengs always go broke. so first we consider where they earn their money from.

1. be bookie, earn commission
2. be runner for ah long, earn commission
3. be waiter, earn few dollars per hour
4. be the boy who pisses you off at mcdonalds because of his fucked up attitude, earn $3 per hour
5. be man-bitch at desker
6. be pimp at geylang
7. race your father's beemer illegally
8. bet on 4D/Toto/Soccer
9. extort money from that geek who sits next to you in class (provided you're still in school)
10. steal pirated CD handphone/wallet from that bitch sitting behind you in class (provided you're still in school)
11. be 啤酒 妹 at the kopitiam downstairs

okay. as you can see. we could think of many sources of income for ahbengs. so we started to talk about where they spend all their money. although we had many sources of income hor, we could only think of a few ways they lose their money.

1. hours at the games arcade playing initial d
2. buy cigarette
3. buy drugs
4. buy drinks which they can barely afford at a club
5. dying their hair
   

so we considered of the 5 options which one will most likely make an ahbeng go broke in the shortest time.

1. considering the ahbeng has spent countless of hours in front of that machine, he should be quite good at it. a token should be able to last him for almost an hour on machine. take cost of a token as 5o cents, the ahbeng spends $1 per hour here, 1/3 of what he would earn at mcdonalds.
2. considering the ahbeng buys his cigs from uncle bob(50cents per stick) and smokes 5sticks a day, the ahbeng spends $2.50 a day, his pay for an hour at certain mcdonalds outlets.
3. i do not have any idea how much this would cost the ahbeng, so we shall take it as 30bucks per month.
4. since the ah beng goes to an ulu club which would let him in even though he's underaged, there would be no entrance fee. considering the ahbeng wants to act macho and only drinks the most expensive cocktail on the menu even though he cant stands the taste, he spends approx. $15 per shot. considering that he and his friends drink a total of 10 shots that night, he spends $150 in a day.
5. as most of us have noticed, ah bengs like to dye their hair very often, making sure that by the time they get arrested and thrown into jail for underaged clubbing/smoking/taking drugs/smoking in a non-smoking area/starting a fight over a game of initial d/gangfight, they would have at least had their hair dyed every colour of the rainbow, in different combinations. if i still recall from my a maths, this would mean that they would have to have their hair dyed a total of 7!=5040 times! since he would want it done before he goes into jail, which is estimated to be when he is 16(age that a teenager can be charged in court). considering he drops out in sec2(15 years old since he retained in primary6), he would only have 365 days to dye his hair 5040 times! this means, he has to dye his hair every 104.2857 minutes to be able to achieve his goal! assuming he pays $100 each round, he spends a whopping $50400 in a year!

after a long discussion and a casualty to victoria's secrets, we were able to conclude that the average ahbeng spends all his money at the hairstylist, before going to jail.

oh and by the way, our definition of an average ahbeng would be one who is sent to jail before his seventeenth birthday. if you are sent to jail after your seventeenth birthday, you are classified as an under-average ahbeng. if you are sent to the boys home when you are 14 and was transfered to changi chalet when u hit 16 and stay there til you are at least 25, you are a hardcore beng. if you are 18 years old and still not in jail, you are a wannabe beng.

okay, this concludes our discussion on ah bengs. thank you for your attention.

HAHAHA

jusst now we were having msn conference:

shawn:so how friday how
me:pon tang la
kingston:EH BRB VICTORIA SECRETS
me:HAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAH FUCKER! must blog about this~!!

who can you recognise?

ouch!

eh. how come i can kena electrocuted by the guitar strings ah? anyone know tell me leh. very irritating leh. hahaha

****

anyway, just now on my way home i was think. when i come home i usually take a shortcut through the smoker's section at the anchorpoint foodcourt. so would avoiding the secondhand smoke and wasting time taking the long route(save me time at the end of my life) or would taking the shortcut and inhale secondhand smoke(kills me earlier) save me more time?

hmmm.. i wonder..

el kardian

WAHAHAH. just now i was damn bored, so i went to check out the elkardian forums.

okay. so elkardian was a game i used to play before poly started. was dragged into it by trey chua. it calls itself singapore's first MMORPG. yeah, and it sucks big time too. haha. used to be quite popular few years back when it was free. now they charge wad? 18.90 a month for 3 chars and you can probably count the number of active players in the gzame with your left hand. not including secondary chars. so rrecently they made a new server, hoping to attract new players. the new server inside is pvp setting everywher. means you walk around can wack people one. then just now i saw a thread in the forum. it read,

"i been playing on the pvp server on my 7 day free trial but i cant find anyone to fight or anyone for that reason where do i go to find people"

wahahahahha i laugh until my balls almost drop off. poor elkardian. see la. i quit only nobody want to play liao. hahaha. and the forum seems to be dominated by big pussy(trey would know who i'm refering to. heh). every forum says last post by him.

whats the world coming to. hahaha.

gao tim.

i finally finished kenneth tan's report. but there's still the report on contral sensitivity which i havent touched yet. opps. shhh. don't tell xiang jiun. hahahah. and my fingers ache. but not from typing the report. lol.

****

just now shawn tan call me. ask me whether down here got rain anot. knn since when i become weather boy. cheebye. shld have bluffed him tell him very sunny then he come down from yio chu kang/ang mo kio/ wherever the fuck he is. and then raining. bwahahha. but wasted. my heart to kind already. so i give an even better i answer: 'err. i cant tell leh.' HHAHAHAHA. dunno whether he came down anot. anyway the rain rain awhile then stop liao. hahha.

fall out boys

hilarious. dedicated to john tan weiyang!

yucks

the fucking dog just vomitted on the bed and ate his vomit all back up. fucking dog.

contral sensitivity is another..

..huge pain in the fucking arse. microbiology practs, anatomy practs, physiology practs and rwp reports are also big pains in the ass. aiya, school is a pain in the ass la.

worst is physiological optics. everytime the question come out so chim. make us think so hard, then when monica give answer, kanina is so simple only. waste braincells. think harder confuse yourself only. sometimes don't think too hard may be a good thing also sial. hahah.

****

The other day when me and shawn tan were at colds storage buying stuff for the bbq, we came across this price tag.


so.. your sweet potatoes from japan or vietman vietnam huh?

holland village x.o. fish head bee hoon

today we go to holland village for xo bee hoon during our break. before we consume the xo already our lao da abit high. in the bus 74 on the way to holland he stick out his head and shout 'chio bu' at 2 acjc girls outside the bus. wasted we all hide forget to say 'buay bah' hahahaha. those were the days man. 'MIKE LEE KAHENG!' HAHAHAHAH.

hahha okay need to do cd presentation now. out.

queensway shopping center

today went with edmundand zhida to queensway to buy things for new year. i think edmund strike 4d recently. because he this few days like feeling very rich. actually i go queensway my main intention was to kill the time and give shawn tan some time to bring his ass from yio chu kang down to safra to play pool. but the motherfucker pang seh me. so nevermind. go shopping! wahahahah.

i bought steve vai's anthology. so far i'm enjoying it! hahaha. actually last time i didn't quite like him. but after i heard the G3:rocking the free world recordings, i felt he had the best songs among satriani and malmsteen. so.. yeah. ahahaha. quite nice!

from wikipedia

# In his free time, (William)Hung is a fan of the anime Pokémon, and is an avid player and online strategy writer for the trading card game based on the series.
# In the aforementioned card game, William Hung has placed surprisingly well, Making the Top 32 at the 2005 World Championship with a "Sharpedo" deck.

HAHAHAHAHHA!

humans

why do humans die in 4minutes if the body lack oxygen?

because, if humans stop breathing for 4 minutes, the amount of oxygen accumulated on earth will increase. and since we know oxygen is a flammable gas, the excess oxygen on earth will blow the earth up if there is a single spark, killing humans.

why do humans die in 4days without water?

because if humans don't consume water, the excess water on earth will flood the earth, submerging land, killing humans.

why do humans die in 4months without food?

becuase if humans don't consume food in 4months, the amount of pigs, cows, chickens and whatever other shit humans eat would have reproduced enough offspring to outnumber humans, revolting against them, as seen in the novel animal farm by george orwell, killing humans.

cool

edmund: eh you ah kwa leh cannot poke the thing in
me:cheebye fuck u ah. u dare no even touch the thing. hahahha.

****

chris: you must pluck the lens out. eh the lens is stuck to the cornea.
all: wahhh.
chris: neh come out already! da da da da da duh duh duhhhhh(final fantasy victory music).
me: wah cher got play ff one ah.

****

edmund: eh my iris like come out leh. wahh eh this is cool man.
me: cheebye. just now who say pervert one kanina.

****

edmund: eh we shouldn't wear glove leh. very hard to hold leh
me: fuck you take out your gloves la. wear glove also dare not touch.
edmund: you think i dare not ah?
(end up the fucker also never take out his gloves)
****

a few quotes i got from rewatching the video. hahahha.

balls

song ah. today we cut pig eyes. very fun leh! hahahha.
hahah actually i got a 30min long video of me edmund and zhida cutting the eye. but its fucking 115mb and youtube only allows a maximum upload of 100mb. i'll post it up when i learn how to cut down the size. lol.

wow

wow. they are fucking good.

music theory

i recently decided to learn music theory. and i remembered why i hated my piano lessons last time. haha.

plastic notes

i was watching news on channel 8. then when the went around to inter view peopl abput the new plastic 2 dollar notes, 1 guy say 'look nicer, can use longer also'(translated). nabei, u tell me, paper notes u see dirty u throw away meh? no logic.

then another old man champion. he say 'no good. 摸下去不爽. don't feel real.'(i only remember that part in chinese la.) hahahah! kao peh. DON'T LIKE GIVE ME LA!

wah.tv got mr. bean again. so since its already 2006, the counter restart already. this is the first time this year i'm watching the episode of mr. bean where he took over the barber shop. hahah.mr. bean is one of the shows that you've watched so many times that you can remember the exact times that the background laughter plays.

****
anyway, just now during the break we went to west coast for lunch and pool. i'm supposed to have boycotted that place. but since everyone wanted to go so i follow lor. hahha. anyway it was raining while we were on the way there and people who know the place knows that to go from sp to west coast must take bus to clementi central and walk. so it was raining on the way there. so we were walking walking walking, den i turn around, i thought i kwa tio gui! hahahah.

THIS 2 AH KWA TAKE OUT THE LAB COAT AND COVER LIKE RAINCOAT! hahahah. somemore the rain so quite small oni la. hahaha.


hahahaha. our lao da i thought he beat bangla, pull girls hair quite macho one. actually so ah kwa! hahahahah.

wah! somemore hor, west coast zhng their house cues already! now very shiok to play. hahaha. but must go in the morning, when the biatch is not on shift. hahaha. so nvm, joshua hor, very hum leh! hahahah. go play pool, dun wan play with other people, insist on playing with the same person. wah liew, make me go all the way there den dun play with me, dun give me face ah? hahaha. like that, might as well dun play. go play poolcompsonline.com or blastbilliards also better la. hum ah! hahahaha.

okay la. i need to go and do rwp already. big waste of time. out.

its raining its pouring..

..trey chua's going to bed before 10pm the first time in 6years.

if this weather continues, it'll be another 6 years before he goes to bed after 10pm. lol.

this few days no mood to blog. got mood to sleep only! hahaha.

jialat.

wah. just now i wanted to use my phone to record something, when i picked up my phone, instead of going to the recorder, i instinctively went to open tetris. LOL! jialat ah.

spot the mistake

spot the mistake!
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'help me check got anything wrong or did i miss out on anything.'

KANINA! NEVER ATTACH FILE CHECK SIMI LAN JIAO! HAHAHAHAHA.

moment in the life of arun

hahahahah. so sad right! nobody in his class one! hahahah. not surprising la. who would want to hear about 'wiruses'?

lao da and new year's eve countdown party

wah. just now lao da tell us what he did at the countdown party in orchard road. he tell us he and 4 or 5 of his friends see this 2 foreign workers from an unspecified country(FMFAUC) who were crazy in love holding hands. he say he take the foam spray sprary the first FMFAUC then his 4 other friends go and hantam the guy! HAHAHAHA. then they all go and grope the other FMFAUC who was holding the FMFAUC's hands! HAHAHAHA. I DIDN'T KNOW OUR LAO DA WAS SUCH A PERV! ahhahahah.

no la. i think lao da was talking cock la. hahaha. but on second thought, i think he was talking cock about the talking cock part. so.. heh.

anyway, i got a picture of the securing your pc lecture hall just now. i will post it when i reach home. hahaha. later.

la la la.

whoo. just now go karaoke with the 4g people. quite fun man. even though 5 of us (me shane shawn cyy daniel) had the room to ourselves for 2/3 of the time because the other 5 assholes came late. lol. shawn tan say. he book room at 7pm. say meet at 6pm because people sure late. next time must arrange 3at least 3 hour earlier already la. hahaha.

anyway. after today, i realise that we are all living in the wrong era man. go sing karaoke we sang rock 'n roll hits from the '60s and '70s, disco hits from the '80s and pop hits from the '90s. i think the only songs that we sang which were rather new was.. err.. tong hua and tuo tiao! HAHAHA. shawn loves the '80s. well.. he owns the cd 'i love the eighties' at least. from its title i think you can tell that its a compilation of songs from the disco era. kanina. now reach home i realise that our playlist din get a chance to play funkytown we kena chase out already. what a waste man. hahahha.

shawn this motherfucker keep adding songs like twinkle twinkle little star and humpty dumpty. anyway, til now i am still wondering what these fuck nursery rhymes are doing on the damn list of songs.

actually, looking back, i think its more cost effective to have our daily karaoke sessions in xie lao shi's class, rather than coming out paying 10 bucks per person, we get to do it for free in the classroom. only drawback is that got no lyrics for us to see and no videos that have chio bus for cyy to see. hahaha. eh, talk about cyy ah, you see he chinaboy right, dun play a ful with him ok. this chinaboy can sing michael jackson songs like he's michael jackson dammit. all we could do was fill in the ocassional 'OW!'s and 'WOO!'s for cyy while he was singing 'black & white'. wasted the sound system not good enough for the china mei mei at the massage parlour in the row of shophouses opposite to hear. otherwise.. cyy will be the happiest chinaboy on earth for tonight man. hahaha. TONG ZHI MEN! dui mian de nu hai kan guo lai~ kan guo lai~~ kan guo lai~ bu yao bei zhe ge gou de yang zi xia huai~~ qi shi taaa~~~ HEN KE AI!!! hahahahah.

wasted we had so only abt 10 people. if more people go sure will be more fun. but bastards like bensong, john tan, jason ow and henry neo bak zhang all shy to sing song dun wan go. wasted sial. actually don't need all of them la come to think about it. all we needed to complete the session was 1)Wong Wen Kang singing 'wang qin shui' 2)Koh Lung Fei singing 'Rhythm of the Rain' or 'Speedy Gonzalez' or 3)John Tan singing '' with a certain unnamed individual of the opposite gender. but too bad. none of this happened. what a waste, otherwise our evening would have been complete. but look on the bright side, at least we got chen yu yan to sing billie jean, black&white and heal the world. hahaha.

okay man. talk enough. i think gabriel was taking photos just now. i'll post them up when i acquire them. maybe u can even get to see me singing joy to the world! joy to the fishes in the deep blue sea~ joy to you and me! out! *deep elvis voice* thank you, thank you very much.

my addiction.

i've got a confesion to make. i am seriously addicted to tetris. last night i lay in bed for almost an hour playing tetris on my handphone. this morning i woke up with a major neckache. dammit. i might just pull out my phone to play tetris tonight while shawn is singing 'staying alive' at the class gathering.

****

yesterday shawn tan was saying. would your shit or your vomit taste better? then rynel say. next time you eat finish you vomit out your food then u keep in a plastic bag. then you bring back to the restaurant and say 'hi. this is your baked rice. can help me put in the microwave awhile?' hahaha SICK RIGHT! hahaha.

screw it!

i have officially sworn off local productions with names that have a prefix 'super-' or a suffix '-idol'. they all suck. no originality at all. screw it!

road rage?

hahah. as u can see, the both of them suck big time in the game. shawn tan was driving in the opposite direction and rynel crashed into the wall. hahaha.

****

anyway, long time nvr visit arcade sial. maybe besides the last time we went to recky see got wad games. but today we spent quite a long time there sia. initial d! hahaha. quite fun sia. first time we ever managed to complete the first course.(as in reach the finish line) but i still lost to shawn. dammit. haha. the car lousy la. otherwise i confirm win one. hahaha. anyway now we all pro already. who want to challenge us remember to make a 3week advance appointment and make sure the espn crew is called down. otherwise we won't play with you. hahaha. then got the soccer game must kick the ball on the floor one. nabei kick until leg pain the guy on the screen still never kick the ball. machine spoil one i think. hahaha.

then later we went to the cafe downstairs to eat. actually the meal is really quite worth it. hahaha. eat dessert there also. quite shiok man. next time pak kiew finish can go there eat then play initial d. hahaha. the set means there are actually more economical than macs. hahaha. tastes good to. just stay away from the ginger beer. damn.

then rynel su wanted to go bukit merah central irated cd shop buy game for his brother who will be leaving s'pore tmr at 4am to study. but too bad. by the time reach there shop closed liao. hahha. wasted sial. actually wanted to go to 7/11 but the drink that look like got dentures inside. but i think they don't sell it anymore. the last time w saw it i should have take a photo. wasted.

okay la. i need to go to sleep early today. tomorrow playing tennis with zhida and edmund. but i have a feeling it will be cancelled either because of rain or coach will be too drunk to get out of bed. hahaha. somemore going karaoke with 4G people tmr! hahaha. can see joel new girlfriend! hahaha. out!

kanina

knnbccb! next time i dun want to pass up first already! not good man.

nabei. the seat i sitting at the feng shui also no good. maybe thats why. i sit here teacher can see everthing on my screen sial. very inauspicious. hahaha. $%^&*@#$%^&!!!

$%^&*#$%^&

i dunno whats with my sister's suddenly obsession with linkin park. dammit. good charlotte or michael jackson still can, but linkin park... $%^&&$%!!! and about 30 minutes ago i was cursing about that irritating cover of that aerosmith song by a new found glory. den suddenly she come and play linkin park. my ears are bleeeeeeeeeding.

hahah anyway, mr bean is on tv. i dunno why sia. everytime i watch the same episodes but its still damn funny. hahaha. oh. the credits are rolling now and she finally un-muted the tv and shut off that irritating music of hers. damn. yawn.

wah. last night i had a damn weird dream. i dreamt that i was on a bus to malaysia alone. then in my bag i had an ipod mini, creative zen touch, nokia 8210(that didnt have any battery) and alot of other stuff that i cannot recall. then when i reach the immigration there, kanina i realise i never bring passport. wahahahah. so i was walking around the place, looking for the bus stop to go back then i heard 'ding dong doors closing toot toot toot toot toot' chao chee bye. shawn tan early morning 6am sms me about dunno wad nonsense wake me up. hahahha. then later i fall asleep again got another weird dream. but i cant remember what its about. hahaha.

okay la. i need to go to school already. blog again tonight. later.

zhng my face

today zhng my car got new episode ah. johnny call ah hock teach him to zhng his face ah. den ah hock call johnny go phuck-et take holiday. the way ah hock pronounce phuket got sound like my blog name hor? LOL!

****

wah that day ah shawn tan recommend me go and eat his delifrance the club sandwich. wahh. today on the way home i very hungry ah so i go inside delifrance and ta pao come home eat. wah the thing was so fucking huge man. i couldnt finish it in one go. ahaha. shawn tan nowadays like take over my role as the bottomless pit ah. hahaha. but the sandwich was quite good man. only problem was its size la. which isn't that big of a problem. heh. next time come home dun go eat 7/11 club sandwich already. go delifrance. price triple but size and taste oso triple. hahaha.

supposed to hear people talk cock about opthalmoscopes today. but must wait until 3 oclock, really wasting time. so we send our messenger joshua to listen for us and tell us which opthalmoscope to buy. lol. actually why need to listen to them talk. just give us the brand names we can look them up on the internet mah right. zhida say they go there talk so u can touch the thing mah. i say lan jiao understand, you touch the thing like you know how to use like that. buy opthalmoscope and buy vegetable from ntuc different okay. hahaha.

okay la. continue another time. out.

today is the first day of school

today is the first day of school and the 3rd day of the new year. and i realise i haven't made any new year resolutions for 2006. i hope it isnt too late. heh.

1. stare blankly into the computer screen less when i'm bored
2. instead of staring into the computer screen blankly when i'm bored, i should watch more tv.

yeah. i think thats about it. cant think of anymore leh. hahaha.

****

dammit my nose hurts. i think because just now when i wash my face i accidentally inhale/suck/breathe in(whatever the word is) the face wash. nabei. anyway, today was the first day of school... hmm. i think my nose is fine already. wahahha. anyway. today first day of school. i almost forget wad classroom cd class is in sial. i morning time forget to check timetable. hahah. lucky i met citra on the way up. otherwise jialat ah confirm go wrong class. hahaha. so nvm. today the cd roleplay is about aids one. citra kena act as the one who kena aids. i see her role hor. now i know how come teresa dun wan to do that part. hahahha.

today doctor koh finished her lecture 2 hous early. but its tuesday only. got no draw right? 4D/toto dun have maybe should try go jurong eat mrt/orchard go and buy lucky draw ticket confirm win condo/car/hi-fi set/plasma tv leh. hahaha.

SHIT. the aircon suddenly start leaking. machiam pass urine leh! i wanted to take picture and post one. but take picture already the 'water jet' cannot see already. lolol. oh yeah. remember the post about the dumb ang moh i made about a week ago? there actually are occasional tropical storms in my room when the aircon decides to err.. yeah. and thankfully the blinds are now fixed, so the sun officially rises in the land room where the sun rises from the west through the windows(they're to my west when i face the computer at least) and sets from the east when the lights are shut after 10pm. yes. i live in a weird world.

okay its time to turn my attention to tthe television and stop staring blankly into the computer screen. out.

wasted!

wah just now on the way home ah the bus i was on at the bus stop when want to go off that time suddenly gostan. den behind got 1 more bus. wasted never langah. if got langah den song ah. maybe can take free ride and got show to see. wahahaha.

anyway before that me and shawn tan were at the arcade at safra. wahahah. very fun man. revisit our childhood. wanted to play digital initial d actually. but got a bunch of ah bengs hogging the machine. so we end up play some lao pok sega rally game. not fun one. hahaha. den later play the sniper game. i don't believe i missed the boss on the 2nd stage sia. never missed him before. hahha. but we dowan waste money already so we go to the playground and see see. hahahahahah.

den later we go to the cafe downstairs for tea. yes. the one which i was supposed to have boycotted. hahaha. me and shawn tan shared a baked rice set. like very gh3y hor. hahaha. but the set was not bad la. so i guess can lift the ban of the cafe. just boycott the ginger beer can already hahha.

before that i go to shawn tan house to meet him hor, he say he want to play finish his season first den go play. walao. i watch him play really very boring leh. hahah. yawn.


dunno why the mahjong game i trying to play cannot load. i think need cd to play one. must go find. hahha. out.

vicinity of obscenity

banana banana banana terracotta pie! banana banana banana terracotta pie!

WAHAHHA. SOAD! \m/

happy new year

happy new year everyone!

wah damn sleepy. morning had to wake up so early. zzzz. i want to go and sleep now. night!